Wednesday, June 6, 2012

I Was Spanked As A Child

I am here to admit that I was, in fact, spanked as a child. I am opening up to my parents abuse of me. What cruel, mean and amazing parents. I deserved every single spank I ever got. I grew up balanced, loving and caring for others. I am not a bully. I am not aggressive. I am not an abusive parent. I am just the way I should be. And, yes, I spanked my kids.

I am always amazed when I see a parent trying to reason with their two year old. On what planet can a a two year old even be reasoned with? Their brains aren't even developed enough to understand reason. On the other hand, I would never spank a two year old either, for that very reason that they do not understand. It's a very delicate line that we, as parents, balance on. To spank or not to spank?

As I have mentioned, I was spanked, my parents were spanked, and yes I have even spanked my own children. Here's the thing about it, though I cannot speak for my parents, I can speak for myself and my children. Each and every time I knew - they knew - that they deserved it. 

I was never a "beat some sense into you" kind of mother, just a "sharp reminder" kind. I can probably count the amount of times my kids have been spanked in their lifetime on one hand...... oh ya, and I slapped them each once, and only once. Once is all it took for them to know I was serious. You DO-NOT talk to me like that. It wasn't a knock your head off, leave a hand print kind of slap, just enough for them to know the severity of their actions. After that all it took was a "do not talk to me like that" and they knew they were in the wrong. Both of my kids have grown to be the most gentle, caring and loving adults around. They are not aggressive bullies that go around terrorizing everyone they come in contact with.

Here is where I relay my true personality and thoughts on this matter. In my personal opinion many are raising spoiled brats that walk all over their teachers and others in authority (including their parents) because they are too afraid to take action and discipline their kids. Sometimes a spanking is just what the doctor ordered, but society is confusing us.

If you are out in public with a naughty child, here is the dilemma you face. If you ignore the behavior, and don't give in to their tantrum, then everyone around you looks at you like "do something with your child, I can't believe you are letting them get away with that"; on the flip side if you do take care of it, well then lock um' up for child abuse!....... delicate line my friends, delicate line.

We have so much abuse in this world that it makes me sad. On the other end of the spectrum we have activist with flowers in their hair and scream if you swat at a fly. There has to be balance between the two. Kids need discipline.  They need it to learn, grow and become functioning and balanced adults. And, yes, in my opinion, a spanking sometimes is just what is needed.

So, I am curious on your thoughts. To spank or not to spank? Were you spanked as a child? Did you grow up to be a big fat bully because of it? Have you ever spanked your child, and if not what disciplinary measures do you take instead that seem to work? I really want to know.

picture found on Thoughts India


  1. I was spanked and no I am not a bully...I don't think:) I have never...yet...spanked my kids. I do see the use in it though. I really feel that it depends on the child and the parent. One little slap on the face can get out of control for the wrong parent or the wrong child could take it as more than a little slap. I really believe that one, myself included, should never judge the way a parent chooses to parent their children. There are exceptions of course but I use that as a general rule.

  2. I was spanked only as a child but my mother never really understood what damage it caused, I think most parents don't. I was once slapped in the face, that was out of frustration, not because I did something wrong. I was terrified of her most of the time.
    Not to mention it's abuse and physical assault and is therefore Illegal. I don't think parents should hit their kids in any way ever, under no circumstances.

  3. Interesting thoughts. I agree that there are some parents who take the "authority" role to levels that are completely unacceptable and are too heavy handed. I have seen parents slap a kids hand out of frustration and are too impatient (tiny kids who are too young to even really associate the slap with what they were doing) or yell and demean their kids in public... not cool.

    It definitely is a fine line for sure and every parent has to do what they feel is right for their family. I am not here to judge, just to ramble my thoughts and hear yours.... thanks for sharing!