Thursday, February 9, 2012

The Man Cave: The 7 Habits of Highly Married People

I am not a marriage expert. I have no formal training. I have, however, achieved something many marriage counselors have not: I have been blissfully married for 23 years. Well...23 years this Saturday. In observation of my and Kathy's upcoming anniversary, I present to you this amateur's 7 Habits of Highly Married People.


Contrary to the popular saying, practice does not make perfect. Practice makes permanent. Habits, good or bad, are born of repetition. They have been practiced to the point of permanence. The good news is that they are not unalterable or beyond one's control. They can be purposefully gained and lost. Some of the good habits below I lucked into. Other I have worked hard for. Still others I am still trying to make a permanent part of my personality. They are all things that I have seen strengthen my marriage, or have observed in other strong marriages and aspire to.

Highly Married People:

1. Are independently fulfilled individuals, who value their marriage as the most important personal relationship in their life.

2. Are able to set aside certain personal ambitions in order to allow their spouse and their marriage to succeed.

3. Are able to show physical affection for each other that is not necessarily centered around sex.

4. Never take their spouse's feelings, affections, or efforts for granted.

5. Can allow their spouse to win an argument, even when they are certain their spouse is wrong.

6. Know how to say they are "sorry", sometimes even when they don't think they have done anything wrong.

7. Tell their spouse they love them every time they think it, and demonstrate their love through thoughtful, selfless action.

*photo by Krynowek Eine

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